Meaningless advertising claims:-
Just heard one on the radio this morning, something along the lines of “At Nedbank we understand that your business needs are closely aligned with your business requirements”
WTF does that mean? Anyone who thinks that improves Nedbanks image should be put against a wall with a blindfold, and asked to explain the difference between their requirement to be not shot and their need to be not shot.
Getting R1.45’s worth of interrest on over a grand in my savings account. really? you call this a savings account? the management fees and internet fees are over 6 times more than the interrest i have gotten. wtf?
Seeing said fascilitator’s or employers costs will really irk you! 
He made me think so much I am sitting here cross-eyed with a massive migraine developing. Another irksome little thing: having only two disprins when you know you’re going to need a box…
“Oh hey, yeah, I want to talk to Nedbank about my business requirement to get a R10m non-repayable, transferable (preferably overseas) loan.”
Being treated like cattle, and whipped into a situation reminiscent of “1984”. A horrifying thought, but how do you rebel against beaurocracy?
Subtly. Start, for instance, by hiding their paperclips.
Rigil
Where I’m heading this coming Friday, there are NO paperclips. No eating or drinking at your desk, no socialising with your peers unless it is in the pause area, coffee now needs to be purchased and is no longer supplied for free. Your desk is exactly 1m wide and you are seated in a row that contains 6 people next to each other and the same the opposite side and you cant lean back in your chair as you’re likely to bump into the sod that is seated behind you. No offices, no privacy, I’m surprised that they havent given me a pee-break roster yet. We’re not allowed loose stationary, if you require a pen or a paperclip, you take your pile of papers to some designated area to be bound or pinned or shredded for that matter. I dont even have the luxury of a flippen drawer to stash my shit in.
1984 guys…
Is this happening at your work? It sounds like a call centre, or a classroom at a diploma mill, maybe.
'Luthon64
Yes, its called “restacking”. So we’ve got this really fancy, architectual wonder thats is classified as one of the top “green” buildings in the world but with zero personality and have so many rules imposed on the inhabitants in order to maintain the green status that you cannot even emit a silent fart and not be fined. They want to know why the absenteeism rate shot up in the last year? They want to know why the resignation rate is unprecidented? Just follow my eyes west.
Its got a call centre set up, but instead shove in professionals working with some really sensitve stuff and expect them to shut up and do their work. Its not very successful though. Its based on the chinese sweatshop layout imo, and the rules are similar too.
sigh
Well, actually that does make sense. Farts tend to be high in methane gas, and as everyone knows, methane is, weight for weight, about 25 times as effective a greenhouse gas as carbon dioxide. This means your company should seriously consider providing special fart cubicles where flatulent emissions are ducted to catalytic combustion vessels where they are converted by full oxidation to less harmful carbon dioxide and water vapour… :
'Luthon64
I’m going to side with Faerie on this one. Her company should give her a large private office with a powerful extractor fan, but she will not achieve it unless she makes herself heard.
… augmented daily by a breakfast of eggs, bacon and baked beans. Your advice, then, would be that the solution is alimentary and that everyone concerned should wake up and smell the…
'Luthon64
This forum is the best thing since beans on toast!
I shall henceforth proceed to acknowledge my physical disability and disclose my flatulence problem to the powers that be. I might even receive some weird kickback or another and be listed as a “disabled” employee, it would improve the EE numbers and provide unprecedented kickbacks to me. A win-win scenario if ever there was one!
;D
@ Faerie. and you work there still because?
Its a job?
and I’m in a comfort zone?
and I rather like what I’m doing?
and we’re smack bang in the middle of a recession and I’m in a conservative “Hang onto what you’ve got till the outlook gets better” mode?
actually, I love my job.
@Faerie - I know exatly how you feel. I was hauled into the boss’ office end of the year before leaving for the holidays, to get the annual pep talk. This company (big corporate) is in the throes of restructuring the business - read that to be “ditching employees to improve our profits”. 1200 jobs got the chop. I’ve been here 14 years as an exec. PA. Was told thanks for working so hard this past year,carry on the good work, and oh, BTW, due to the restructuring you may or may not have a job next year. Happy Christmas! My boss is retiring, a fat and happy wealthy cat, at the end of June this year, so he doesn’t give a rat’s ass. So here I sit, having to deal with the possibiilty that I might (or might not) get the chop. Changing jobs is not easy, especially as one is not a spring chicken (I’m 48 - a huge admission but I am brave). I’m uncertain from day to day that I will continue to have a job. It’s a lousy feeling.
in my ten years of working, i have been retrenched 3 times. it’s awesome 
Wow, I guess I’m just extremely lucky… towards the end of last year I told my boss that I was going to take an afternoon off to go to a job interview, as I felt that I just wasnt going to ‘get anywhere’ at their company. He then gave me a 30% raise, a fat bonus, and all but begged me to stay…
We do still open our office meetings with bible study and prayer through…
I suppose every job has its sh*t