For Sale

Other Fun
1

I’m a bit short of cash at the moment, so I’m considering selling my soul.

Surely there is a wealthy benevolent christian type who might like to pay me for it. Bidding starts at US$1m. I’ll promise to praise the lord every day and to attend church ( max 2 hours ) each Sunday.

2

Please advise condition of soul, its chassis number, and contact details of previous owners.

Thanks,
Mintaka

3

This is discrimination! There are laws against this. But how about 250? Cant resist a bargain.

4

This is one Prime A-Grade soul, my man! Minted in the Dark Ages, it has had but one previous owner ( if you discount a brief period as a fluffy black cat ) whose heretical actions caused said soul to spend centuries in Purgatory being cleansed of all evil. As good as new, in fact samey-samey one times virgin soul. Best value money can buy.

Cheapskate! I suppose I could do Rent-A-Soul, and US$250 would get you about 50 Hail Marys and 1 Bloody Mary. I’ll PM you my bank details - all business conducted on a cash-up-front basis ( you can’t be too careful these days ).

5

Why not slice it up in sections and flog it off that way? Didnt that evil dude in the Harry Potter series do just that?

6

I am not the benevolent christian type, but will buy your soul under the following conditions:

  1. My second cousin (with grade 8 ) must be appointed director-general of Home Affairs;
  2. The navy must install my new electronic system in all their corvettes;
  3. Petro SA must buy my million barrels of oil at $140/barrel. Delivery in 2018.
  4. All mineral rights at Sishen must be transferred to my companies.

If you are unable to arrange these few tokens, I am afraid your soul might be worth less than you think.

7

No problem! Just deposit the US$1m in my account and all will be speedily arranged.

8

before I bid pls show me your soul… >:D

9

Deposit the money into an account? That’s for amateurs!