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There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator.
Why do Norway’s warships have barcodes on the side?
So they can Scandinavian.
People are shocked when they find out I’m not a qualified electrician.
Oh that’s so close. If only deep introspection was called refraction. 
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A mobius strip walks into a bar looking very down. The barman asks “Hey, what’s wrong?”. The strip replies: “Where do I even begin?!”
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Haha, maybe he should’ve tried a strip club instead.
Before this job I used to work as a Dolphin interpreter, the perks were not very good… but I still managed to eek out a living!
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My grandma was showing me her new stair lift: “This thing has been driving me up the wall!”
A cheeky nap on Death’s bed is met with grim reaper cushions.
